Bring Me Wil Wheaton!

Wil Wheaton, if you’re out there, and if you ever perchance google yourself and find this blog, just know, that to me, you are perfect, and I will love you forever. More even, than I love Elijah Wood, and let me tell you, that is a lot of love, because he played Frodo Baggins.

If you don’t know who Wil Wheaton is, I’m ashamed of you. Not only did Wil Wheaton star in my favorite movie ever, “Stand By Me,” based off of the novella “The Body,“ which was written by my favorite author, Stephen King, BUT, he also was in a little television series in the late 1980s - early 1990s called “Star Trek: The Next Generation.” He played Wesley Crusher, a child genius and was the love of my eight-year old life. Well, he was co-love of my life along with Neil Patrick Harris in the role of another child genius, on the show “Doogie Howser, MD.” Oh, how our childhood dreams get shattered.

But back to Wil Wheaton.

What’s Wil Wheaton doing these days? Making hysterical guest appearances on “The Big Bang Theory,“ that’s what. His first cameo revolved around one of the lead characters seeking revenge on Wheaton after failing to show up to a Star Trek convention.

But that’s not all he’s been doing. Wil Wheaton writes books now. Several actually. I only recently discovered this after stumbling upon his blog. You heard me right, Deafy McDeafpants! Wil Wheaton has a blog, just like me! Only his has way more people reading it. The blog is hilarious, and I highly encourage you to check it out at http://wilwheaton.typepad.com. When I was a tween, like every other tween girl I knew, I had pictures of all the five million actors I was in love with on my bedroom walls. Wil Wheaton was one of them. Too often though, I’d pick up some magazine like GQ or Vanity Fair or even Entertainment Weekly, not realizing that just because these magazines had my current soul mate on the cover did not mean they were appropriate reading material for a twelve-year-old girl. I remember having my bubble burst upon reading an article on John Cusack, and he said something slutty to contradict his ‘nice guy’ image. I was horrified. How dare you be a real human male with non-romantically comedic sexual urges, John Cusack?! How dare you?!

Then I grew up, and realized that most actors are probably jerks anyway, because who else would choose a career where they get to have people stare at and worship them every second of the day?

But not Wil Wheaton. He is a hero that all geeks should praise and strive to emulate. Not only does he have a super hot wife, but he’s also an exceptionally clever and witty writer, in addition to being a talented actor. Seriously, have you seen “Stand By Me?” That movie defined my youth. My childhood best friend Sarah and I used to act out the scenes where Wil and River Phoenix each break down crying on each other, lamenting how messed up their young lives are. I remember sitting on a bench at summer camp, and suddenly bursting out in a tearful rendition of Wil Wheaton’s monologue where he admits his father wishes he’d died instead of his brother Denny (also played by John Cusack. See how this came full circle?) I’m sure we freaked out more than a few of our fellow campers. It was fantastic. And so is Wil Wheaton.

Let it be known, Wil Wheaton is officially added to the list of “Dudes I really want to meet before I die.” I’ve been reading his blog pretty consistently now, and this past Sunday I started reading one of his books, “Just a Geek.“ It’s a memoir about his struggles to find a career and support his family after quitting “Star Trek.” He has another collection of essays called “Dancing Barefoot,” and I hear he’s begun to dabble in fiction as well. Unfortunately, it seems right now that most of his work is only available in ebook form, and you all know how much I shake my fist at technology. Maybe for Wil Wheaton, I’ll make an exception.